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Breaking this Flesh


I started praying 2 days ago that the Lord would start breaking my flesh. My prayer continues even today to be:

"I want to unlearn this world.....Jesus, humble my heart, break my flesh, and restore me to be more of a reflection of you."

What a beautiful vision of a servant--to disregard the flesh on his or her body in order to glorify the Lord more and more. Too bad I'm soaked in the sin of this world. I'm not saying we sinners can't be someone who disregards the things of this world and strive for the things that glorify the Lord, but I am saying that it's not an easy task. I can't say that I've seen the answer of this prayer yet, but I know that each day that passes, more of my flesh is getting destroyed as my eyes are fixed on Jesus.

Today I had the privilege of visiting all of the schools that we currently have up and operating. It was amazing. Although the facilities aren't complete, the Spirit of the Lord is present. He is driving this whole operation. I was sitting in the backseat of the car driving from Chawama and I noticed that Clay took a back road. Well I'm a HUGE fan of back roads--especially ones that avoid downtown traffic. :) I became so focused on which road he was on, trying to remember every turn he took so I could do it by myself next time. We ended up at one of our sites in an area of town called Kanyama. This area is one of the darkest places spiritually in all of Lusaka, and it's amazing that the Lord has not only blessed us with 1 school, but has given the funding for 3!! The Lord is so good. He loves his orphans soooo much.

One of these 3 schools is situated near an area known as John Leing. I remember in 2009 when I came to camp for 2 weeks that I got a group of boys from this same area in my group. It was confusing because John Leing is actually just a small part of Kanyama, but I could never tell the difference. As we were driving through Kanyama today, I was so focused on how Clay was going to drive through the massive ponds of water that I forgot where we were. We stopped at our John Leing site and I fished in my bag for my camera and my notebook. I hadn't even turned around and I heard, "Auntie Megan, it's Auntie MEGAN!!" I look up to find 6 of the boys in my group sprinting towards me. I had to brace myself as they nearly tackled me to the ground. At that moment, a powerful, overwhelming love for them flooded my heart. I looked at each of them with a longing in my heart. I wanted to cradle them in my lap, rock them gently, hug them tightly, and tell them how much Jesus loves them again and again. I asked them a thousand questions about how they felt school had started off and if they had been enjoying it. I'll tell you this, the way they smiled in 2009 was NOT the way they smiled now. Joy literally radiated from them. The Joy of the Lord was so evident in that place.


I know that I am not at all the reflection of my Lord that I want to be, but today the Lord reflected his joy out of these boys and his love out of me. It was an amazing encounter. Even as I drove off, the boys were standing at the edge of the school waving back to me. Man. My Savior is an awesome Lord.

The coolest part of today was that this same joy was evident at every single school we went to. We saw the smiling faces of beautiful orphans who were so thankful that God had given them a place at a wonderful school where they could find peace and joy.

Now that is a reflection of the Lord.


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