Find rest, O my soul, in God alone

Well, it's that time of the year again.... PUMPKIN ROLLS For the past two years, my family and I have sold pumpkin rolls in order to raise support for Eli and I in some way--mainly adoption costs and transitional costs back to the U.S..  As we continue to sell pumpkin rolls in the years to come, each batch of monetary support will go to a purpose for the Kingdom.  This year, we are selling pumpkin rolls for three reasons! Pumpkin rolls are delicious and perfect for the fall holidays! To help with general overwhelming costs this past year--doctor's appointments that were unexpectedly high, costs related to vehicles, etc. To tuck away until a trip to Zambia becomes a possibility.  That could be as early as August next year, or the August after that, but we are trusting the Lord to provide for us. I don't know exactly what that trip will look like, seeing that we won't be heading back until we have funds available, but I know a very strong desire of my heart is f

Today is a pretty awesome day!   Two years ago, on August 7th, 2012, Elijah David came home for the first time!  And boy what a mess I was! :) Last year on Eli's Gotcha Day, I wrote an entry with 12 awesome pictures of Eli displaying his transformation from Day 1 to Day 365!  So this year I'll do the same.  However, before I let you see the pictures, let me just tell you about my beautiful, precious son. He melts my heart. Elijah is Energetic .  Never does he skip a beat. Whether he's been swimming all day, playing at the park, or running errands with me, he always seems to have energy!  He's especially energetic when he is able to have sugar. One time we were celebrating a birthday party and he had ice cream at 8 pm. Ohhh man, he was running in circles around the kitchen screaming and laughing. Boy oh boy. Elijah is Light .  Not only is he light hearted in his demeanor, but he's a bright bright light to others.  So many people stop and just look at him.  He

This morning Eli slept until 10:20.  A record. Sure he was up until 11 last night, but the fact that the small ounce of sun that trickled through the blackout curtains did not bother him is a miracle :). Unlike him, I awoke this morning delighted. Delighted because for once this summer, I woke up before him. I immediately got in the word and just rested with my coffee, with the quiet of the house, and with the presence of my King resting with me. After some much needed journalling and sitting quiet before his throne, I approached the Word. I've been reading in 1 Samuel about David and Saul.  I'm in chapter 24 today. David has run many times to get away from Saul.  At this specific moment in the Word, David has taken refuge in a cave in the Desert of En Gedi. Saul, in pursuit of David, came to the same cave without realizing David and his men were in there. He went in alone and David had an opportunity to kill him.  His men even said, "This is the day the LORD spoke of

A couple months ago I was approached by a married couple with incredible news.  After eating an excellent dinner and enjoying wonderful conversation, the husband calmly began to ask about my summer plans.  I went through a couple ideas I had put in place and basically said the rest was up for grabs.  I know this man well, and he doesn't ask multiple questions without purpose.  Once he set back in his chair thinking, I said, "Ok, I'm guessing you have something you want to say about my summer plans, because you wouldn't be asking multiple questions unless you have an idea."  To my complete and utter shock, this man nonchalantly asked, "So.... what if I knew a guy who wanted to send you and Eli to Disneyland?  How would you feel about that?" Yes. My mouth dropped open and I froze for a few seconds. "DISNEYLAND???.... Like California DISNEYLAND?? Well..... that... would be... amazing, "was my reply.  He then began to spill out this amazing ble

So Jesus is just here tonight. In my house. In my heart. He's just here. And he's just so still. I recently found this song on my iTunes that I didn't realize I had. What a find it was. Sons and Daughters: Poor and Powerless.  There is something about soft, still worship music that rocks me to the core. My spirit yearns for Jesus as my husband, my comforter, right now... School ends tomorrow. And the last couple of days have probably been the hardest I have had since I landed in July last year.  When things get sticky or somewhat uncomfortable for me in life, I usually run to any distraction. Laying out with friends, out to dinner, movies, books, work....name it. I know that Jesus is the only satisfaction in ANY time--uncomfortable or not--but sometimes I don't really want to face the situation.  I want a distraction. Tonight, however, my heart just yearns for him. I want to be victorious.  I want to feel of worth. I want to be strong.  And, He is the only constant on

Today marks a very very special day in my heart. In fact, it's probably one of the most unique days in my entire life.  Two years ago today, I met my son Eli and said yes to Jesus in pursuit of the adoption. May 16, 2012.  The day was breathtaking, unforgettable and one of the best I've ever had.  The first hug. The first look in his eyes. The first laugh together. The first time to play soccer. The first discussion we ever had--both not having any idea what the other was saying. :) The first time I looked at him and said, "YOU, Elijah, are my son." What an outrageous life transformation we have endured together. Today also marks the light at the end of the tunnel.  Three weeks from today is the last day of school for the 2013-2014 school year.   An ENTIRE SCHOOL YEAR has passed. Woah.  Part of me feels like it's flown by and the other part of me feels like it has taken  forever . I remember reading this blog last year about how moms are the mo

On the eve of the stressful STAAR test, I sit here in the calmness of my home listening to Eli's worship music in his room.  He's resting so quietly, so peacefully, so worry-free.  It's a wonderful place to be in. It's a beautiful image of the gospel: the redemption of my son. I think about those sweet Zambian children waking up full of complete joy as they skip off to class.  I think about those sweet Zambian orphans waking up full of complete sorrow as they wonder if they will get food today.  The Zambian women who head to the market to sell vegetables with their youngest tucked in a chitenge on their backs. And I'm filled with sorrow.  Sorrow for the broken.  Sorrow for the hurting. Sorrow for those who just want more. And I think about the people I've encountered while being back here in Texas. Those who are striving to so radically love Jesus in this cruel and evil world.  Those who don't know Jesus and are walking around wondering if they have anyt

Ok so I totally had full intention of updating the blog throughout the last 5 months buuuuut lots happened--life happened, work happened, being a single mom continued to happen, but the blog just didn't happen :).  Sooo I'd love to recap the last few months for you! :) After Eli's 1 year Gotcha Day, we moved our new life to Euless, Texas where we began our very first home together as the Malnar family!  It was so excited to move to the DFW area and start focusing on the future! :) Literally, the day after we moved everything up here, I went on my "New Teacher Orientation". Yep... the next day. Boy was I exhausted!!  Good thing my mom was here to do all the unpacking ;). Eli went on his first day of Kindergarten in America and it was awesome!! He had so much fun and instantly made friends!! I mean, of course he did...he's such a charmer. In September, we basically just survived... and by survived I literally mean we barely survived